“Dear inn-keeper, I have been captured by the troll you said should only be level 5. He and his twin are both level 30, and send their kind regards for the “unexpected snack.” If they eat me, I swear I’ll haunt the basement, tunnels and guest-quarters of your inn forever. Dutifully yours, Bilbo ”
Tempest in a Teardrop: The Churchians 
“Dear inn-keeper, I have been captured by the troll you said should only be level 5. He and his twin are both level 30, and send their kind regards for the “unexpected snack.” If they eat me, I swear I’ll haunt the basement, tunnels and guest-quarters of your inn forever. Dutifully yours, Bilbo ”
That should do the trick!
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Bahaha!
Of course, Ione may have sold that line many, many years ago…
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Writing on mirrors?
I could see myself doing that.
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It took me a second. “Really, Mr. Wilder, why would you….”
Ohhhh.
**snorts tea out of my nose**
Nice one.
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Thank you.
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Written on the mirror:
“I’m with stupid for seven more years.”
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