A Centennial Comic Christmas Celebration!

It’s a huge week for us because on Friday we’ll be publishing the 100th comic of The Churchians! Not many web comics make it to 100. This is our second comic to hit that milestone. Codex has worn out two mechanical arms in the process. Whew!

Codex likes the story so much that she has threatened to quit, so she can experience the story the same way you guys do. “That doesn’t make much sense,” I replied. “The comic wouldn’t even be half as good without you as the illustrator!” She has to settle with ‘story chunks’, and complains if I brainstorm about future developments with her. Glyph is now my go-to if I really need to talk out the meta of the story.

I wish I could share her ‘shocked face’ when she read the last script of the current story arc. But… no spoilers.

Under normal circumstances, I’d poo-poo anyone talking about Christmas before the Thanksgiving pizza has been served. Our centennial comic is worth it, though, because we’ve decided to hold a giveaway raffle.

Details are below, but if you leave a comment on this post, we’ll toss your name into our magic sorting hat. One week from today, we’ll pull a name from that very same hat, probably at random, and announce the winner.

Is the Prize Something Commonly Found on the Streets of San Francisco?

Of course not! We know you get a bunch of weird stuff randomly delivered via wayward delivery drone. We don’t want to contribute to the chaos in your life. We’ll prepare a special version of our yearly Christmas card. It won’t (quite) be original art, but it will be signed and customized. This year’s theme was inspired by the Dogs of Moscow. It’s as close as we can get to ‘original artwork’.

Are There Qualifications?

Yes!

You must leave a comment on this post within one week. Let us know who your favorite character is, or which of our first hundred comics is your favorite, or just a thank you or congratulations. If you make us laugh, we’ll throw extra copies of your name into the hat!

You must send a snail-mail address to Quizzer’s email within one week of our announcing the winner(s).¬†That’s right! We might pick more than one! We promise not to send your address to every political organization that wants it. If you are international, be very, very specific. We’re cartoonists. If you have an address only reachable via alien teleportation device – Antarctica, say, or certain parts of Canada – then we’re probably not going to be able to enter you into our contest.

I’m barely literate and can only communicate in emojis. How can I up my chances?

We get it. Internet hard. If you recommend our comic to a friend (or hundred) and *they* leave a comment mentioning who sent them – you, presumably – we’ll put extra copies of both your names into the hat. Cheat moar! No poo emojis!

I normally get your Christmas card because we’re friends. Do I need to do anything special?

You’ll still get our regular Christmas card, and it even has a chance of arriving before Christmas this year. However, we’ll certainly upscale it if you want to enter.

I’m not interested in the contest but would still like to offer my congratulations. How can I opt out?

No worries. Just type “opt out’ or ask not to be included in the contest.

Now, we’re off to celebrate in our own fashion. We’re working on comic 101 for Monday.

Thank you, kind Readers, and may the sorting hat favor you!

–> Codex & Quizzer

The Shaming

This might be the world’s first fully-interactive comic! To participate, you’ll need 1) a working finger capable of a full-flex extension and 2) a very loud voice. Point at your screen, Chime in particular, and yell ‘SHAME’ in your loudest voice! Forget your coworkers, family, or fellow Bible study attendees: you didn’t want them to talk to you for the rest of the day anyway.

If you need to warm up or practice first, try it in front of a mirror.

The Imminent Destruction of Seattle

Hey all. Codex here.

Today’s post is a bit of a pickled watermelon. Quizzer thought he was immune to The Crud, which invaded the household this week. Since my back log of extra strips is shot, he said: “Don’t worry, Codex! I’ve got you covered.”

Hahahahahaha. Nobody escapes the Cycle of Snot. He did miss the exciting secondary infection Glyph succumbed to, though.

Today he came staggering downstairs, grabbed the bottle of Nyquil and took a couple of shots.

“Sickness, fatigue, nose honey, hubris, stupidity, skull-n-bones, and the imminent destruction of Seattle!” he spluttered. Then he went into a coughing fit and collapsed onto the couch. Before passing out into a haze of mucous and over-the-counter syrupy nostrums he muttered, “”The Economist 2015 is the key.”

I’m assuming he means this. I found it on his computer.

Apparently you have to have the right cover, because it changes depending on which language you get it in. “That’s how you know they are serious,” he told me on Friday, while researching this post. At least I think he did. I was still pretty sick then.

Encoded in the cover are five critical symbols that foretell the imminent destruction of Seattle on November 3, during the Seattle Seahawks vs. the Tampa Bay Buccaneers football game. Kickoff is at 1:05 Pacific Standard Time. Yes, seriously. According to his notes there are episodes of The Simpsons with details, but since Glyph is older than the last time they were funny, I’m not well enough to watch.

Quizzer isn’t the superstitious type and I’m not even sure why I’m piecing this together from his fever-inspired notes.¬† On the other hand, “stay out of Seattle” is always good advice. And you can’t go wrong buying an extra bag of of marshmallows and doubling the liquor budget for a week.

If you really want to delve into this mystery, this thick-accented German fellow will get you started. He seems sincere. But no, we can’t give you the 30 minutes back.

Stay safe out there.