I’ve painted more walls than I thought existed in our house. Apparently I’m not done yet. Who builds a house with a thousand walls? Who repaints them? And why didn’t we use fire to make the moving process far, far easier?

I’m treating the equipment far better than myself. This roller, for example, is luxuriating in a nice bubble bath after a hard-days work. The shadows make the sink look filthy. It isn’t.

I feel obligated to pass on some advice regarding hanging things on your walls. Consider this bonus content. Use it. Ignore it. I’m not the wall police, your insurance adjuster, or the fire department.

If you use these doohickeys, featured next to other junk and dog hair,

The plastic bulging things. Not the screws, nails, sink, or hair.

It leaves giant holes once they fail (they will) and the thingy you want to hang never feels completely secure anyway. I don’t care what it is, from shelves (scary) to a toilet paper roll holder (less scary). I’m assuming you live in a house with drywall. If you live in a house with brick, plaster, cardboard, velvet, ice, or extruded plastic goo walls then ignore this. I have no experience in such an abode.

I filled 47 of these in my latest painting binge.

The putty dries to a nice, sensible white, guaranteed to get you kicked out of six million establishments.

Sand after drying. Then hide it all with fresh paint.

The better way is to get a board. Miter the edges (optional), paint it the wall color, and screw it into the studs. Then hang whatever you need to hang with screws. Believe me, you can place the art (or whatever) exactly where you want it and it will feel totally secure. It won’t shift, partially pull out, or leave a million huge, ugly, gaping holes if you want to move things around.

Shelf ala Quizzer. Looks good. Very secure.

This also works well for tall bookshelves. You don’t even have to paint the cleat. That’s technically what the wood backing-board is called.

My favorite way of hanging stuff, especially large stuff, is via a french cleat. You’ll have to iSearch for that. It takes a bit more technical skill to do, but it provides flexibility to switch things about and is very, very secure. Is it overkill? Yes, in most cases it probably is. But if you want flexible shelving with modular units it’s fantastic.

One more note: pictures. We have some large, heavy paintings and I’d go with these

to hang them. They aren’t as secure as I’d like, but they do the job and do it well. Better than a nail, for sure.

Keep in mind, we don’t have hurricanes or tornadoes where we live. But we do have earthquakes and politicians who have great, hairy, dashing socks. So that’s what we prepare for. I’d love to hear advice from those of you who live with different challenges. Toss them in the comments below.

We also discovered this miniature door in the office area.

It leads to an attic space. We forgot it was there. It’s been more than 20 years since we opened it. With great trepidation, we prepared for anything. Fire? Extra ballots? Mr. Tumnus?

Um, yeah. We’re traumatized, which is why we don’t have a comic for today. We’ll be back Friday, but we’re not promising anything for a week after that. The carpet guys are coming in the middle of the week after, and we’re going to play furniture Tetris like it’s never been played before: 3D. Multiple-story. Many rooms.

We’re hoping our new attic frenemy will help. We’ve promised her one of the carpet guys…

–> Q