We wrapped up The Churchians: Shadow Saints, and to celebrate, I let Codex out of the basement and set her in the front yard. “Get a little sun”, I said. “Hop about. Frolic on a decaying stump. Go! Be a mushroom.”
Now? She’s gone. Presumed reading someplace nearby. Thank goodness she showed me how to use the cartoon-making gizmo I normally keep her chained to. There must be more to it though, because I pushed all the doohickeys, dialed in the dials, made sure the fuel reservoir was filled with coffee, and double-checked the paper-retaining chamber.
I got this:
Yeah. This is not the quality entertainment you all stop by for.
So seeing as we’re between books, it’s a good time to take a break. We have two special comics next week, and then the splash page for The Churchians: Night Veg running the following Monday. That will be our third book if anyone can still do math. We suspect most of you can, since our comics are numbered sequentially… and they are now conveniently arranged in our soon-to-be-out-of-date Archives!
In the meantime, you can continue to search for fuel. Please do so carefully. The beloved worker-bees at the Department of Transportation Twittered out some good, practical advice about the crisis. “Do not put gasoline in plastic bags.” We needed to hear that. Or at least, the Tribal Peoples of the Blue Checkmark did. Here are some other safety tips:
- Do not store gasoline in paper bags, either.
- Do not drink any gasoline you find.
- If you do drink the gasoline, do not attempt to light your burps on fire.
- If you find any gasoline, do not put it in a federally-mandated gas can.
- If you manage to get any gasoline into a federally-mandated gas can, you will not be able to get it out again. I know. I’ve tried.
- Do not pump gasoline directly into your glove box or other storage compartment in your vehicle.
- Do not inject yourself with a used Covid needle, whether it contains gasoline or not.
- Do not store gasoline in a five-gallon bucket, even if you have it covered in tin foil.
- Do not try to fill your vehicle with propane.
- Do not drink the propane.
I could add more, but thinking “How else could a moron possibly screw this up” makes my head hurt. The list is endless. Feel free to contribute in the comments, and have a great weekend!
–> Codex & Quizzer
Tempest in a Teardrop: The Churchians 
Amazingly, I *have* managed to get gasoline back out of “Federally mandated container”… but it took MUCH patience and I wanted to swing a BEEEEG axe at EVERYONE involved until I realized that would be ***FAR*** TOO KIND. No. They should be on the Dan Ryan in Chicago. At 5:30 PM Central Time. Out of gas. With a federally mandated can. They should learn and know genuine SUFFERING.
If Chicago is disallowed, I am flexible. Downtown Atlanta (at the SAME TIME, etc.) will also do.
I have traveled through both Chicago (on the Dan Ryan parking lot) AND Atlanta at (anything but) rush hour, so I know at least some what I speak.
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Been there, done that, have the
replacement nozzle kit from Tractor Supplyt-shirt. Shockingly, there are no videos on the UTube showing how to fix said cans.LikeLike
Reminds me, I need to add that vent hole before the next refill.
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Dun been did. Finally.
Also gave the car’s ignition wires a new coating of hot sauce. No, you read that right. I’ve had two sets of ignition chewed up by some rodent(s) or other(s). Now there is a deterrent to that.
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We used to be smarter as a species but that’s because so many died from doing something stupid.
When being stupid doesn’t matter and no consequences and modern medical care can fix all sorts of things, you get more stupidity.
What’s the worst that can happen?
A doctor will fix it!
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Yep, we’re going to need more Darwin Awards.
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> “How else could a moron possibly screw this up”
Styrofoam containers.
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Oh, good one. Home-made napalm ftw. Sorry you got caught in moderation purgatory!
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Went the other route, and bought the old-style metal can with removable funnel. The flapper lid seal works fine. The unworkable spout is what happens when stupid makes itself places in the preventive bureaucracy, and never gets the well-deserved public derision from the Good Idea Fairy smiting them with the Wand of Consequence, +2 (+8 for bureaucrat).
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You could *FIND* a metal can?!
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I searched the big home improvement stores and farther on the web for it, a couple years back, after the third nozzle “fix” kit for those [polite speech] ‘EPA approved’ plastic things.
Search on “Eagle Type I Safety Can”, for 1, 2, 2.5, 5 gallon capacities. Not jerry cans, but the bright red steel cans formerly common. Still show up as being in stock, in a number of places.
Just thinking out loud …
If someone wants to use styrofoam, they should also use soap flakes, so it’s easier to clean up the resulting mess. Stir well, of course. :-()
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Smart.
I’ll volunteer to fill in for the smiting role. I’ll even put on the official outfit. But I’m not wearing a mask while I do it. They deserve to see how much I love the job 🙂
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We love Codex!
May she mushroom in peace!
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Congratulations – the amount of talent and toil that must go into this is amazing.
Thank you for doing it.
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